jenny. nyeneks. jen. twenty-one.
currently a bum, but not for long. youngest of five. singer. loves to eat. sentimental. luvs music. butterflies. christian.
trumpets
girl. grad team. joyclub.
about site.
version: three. simple things. host:blogger. tools: microsoft frontpage, adobe photo deluxe, loads of love. c",)
what about?
this
site is where she rants and blogs about her oh-so-colorful
life, sprinkled with the simple joys God has blessed her with.
this is my fave song for a month now. i have fallen in love with this song since the first time i heard it at wave 89.1. amazing. =)
RAINBOW
south border
fallin out fallin in
nothings sure in this world no no
breaking down breaking in
never knowing what lies ahead
we can really never tell it all no no
say goodbye say hello
to a lover or friend
sometimes we could never understand
why some things begin with just love
we can never have it all
no no no ohh
but oh, cant you see
that no matter what happens
life goes on and on
and so baby just smile
coz im always around you
and i'll make you see
how beautiful life is for you and me
* take a little time baby
see the butterflie's colors
listen to the birds that sent to sing for me and you
can you feel me
this is such a wonderful place to me
even if there is pain now
everything will be alright
for as long as the world still turns
there will be night and day
can you hear me
there's a rainbow always after the rain
hittin high hittin low
win or lose you should go
yeah yeah
getting warm getting cold
weather can be so good or bad
but baby this is life so dont get mad
no no no
coz ohhh
can't you see
that no matter what happens
life goes on and on
and so baby just smile
coz im always around you
and i'll make you see
how beautiful life is for you and me
(repeat *)
life's full of challenges
not all the time we get what we want
but dont despair my dear
you'll take it each trial
and you'll make it through the storm
coz youre strong
my faith in you is clear
so i say once again
this world's beautiful
let us celebrate life that is so beautiful
so beautiful...
THE DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL spiritual dryness, doubt and estrangement from God
i was reading PDL last night before i sleep, and all the words i read pierced into my heart. I had to stop, think and reflect as i go through every sentence. I heard all the words that i need to hear, and i realized a lot of things.
"The deepest level of worship is praisng God in spite of pain, thanking God during a trial, trusting Him when tempted, surrendering while suffering and loving Him when He seems distant"
"The situation that will stretch your faith most will be those times when life falls apart and God is nowhere to be found"
"Never doubt in the dark what God told you in the light"
"Circumstances cannot change the character of God"
i learned much from it, and i realized a lot of things. once again i was reminded that eventhough i cant feel Him, He is still there. His silence doesnt mean that He's absent, i still believe that He will never leave me nor forsake me whatever happens.
Though im at "the dark night of my soul" Lord, i want you to know that I love you just the same. And i praise and thank you for doing this to me. I believe that this is just a test of my faith and trust in you, and i will still hang on to your promises to me... i wont let you go. I love you Lord... so much. =)
have you ever felt the feeling that you just wanna run away, but you dont know where to go? that's how i feel the past couple of days. im experiencing a big problem now that i can't tell anybody... because it's very confidential. i cry each night as i pray and wonder that my tomorrow would bring... i wish that this will soon end.
it was so hard to keep a painful feeling in my heart... i just wanna burst it all out.. but i cant. =( too bad... i cant.
im at a very low point in my life now... almost all of my life aspects are falling to grave. seems like nothing good is happening to me... damaged relationships, terrible finances, unmanaged responsibilities, etc.
the memories are coming back to me now -- same place, same face. i can smell the memories of the butterflies around me again... as the reason who used to make my heart flutter so much is moving around me again.
i used to pray for him... and felt the butterflies in my stomach as we run, play and fool around like kids beneath the same ceiling. the sweetness of our friendship melted my heart... as to hear his voice means comfort and assurance that everything would be alright.
he's one of those few guys im my past that i treasure so much. but i already gave him up to my masters hands, for i believe that it would be better for me to enjoy my friendship with him and other different guys as i wait upon the best person God has prepared for me.
when he held my hand moments ago, like we what we usually do, i knew that a small portion of my heart is still disturbed by his presence... yet my strong convition and faith to my masters plan keeps me from releasing the butterflies again.
guess what? im here at ibm again... not just for a visit, but for work again. my bosses requested me to report again here this week, because they are preparing for the audit and they need my help. they need extra work force, and they need my expertice *ehem* for some technical stuffs to do. haha!
they are asking me to work as a trainee here again during my free time, but i still need to think about it. i feel bad already, im tired.
im here with my old thinkpad again, still with my old wall paper and settings =) i miss the office life! the ambiance, the technical language, the noise, the cold temperature =) hehe.
the office world is really far different from school. cant wait to graduate! =)
its been quite a long while since the last time i blogged. i cant blog often these past few days since i got no pc at home anymore =( so sad... hope to get one again soon =)
im at school right now, still waiting for my next prof to come. i feel so bored and lazy to be a student again. grrr...
a lot of thing happened to me the past weeks... really exciting experiences =) but too bad, i havent documented it here. it's hard to recall the details of it anymore. haha.
i miss blogging my stuffs and reading blogs of my blog friends as well. *check out my links* =)
i'll find time soon to write down my thoughts again... my site has to catch up. hehe. =)
the girl.
